This text below was written by Richard Allard on the tenth anniversary of the Boston trip for a scan of the original typewritten letter click here
January 23, 1985
Dear Athletes (real or imaginary),
The Bored of Directors of the L.T.H.T. is pleased to announce the coming of its tenth annual pilgrimage to the wilderness city of Boston. Yes, you heard right - the tenth annual: Who would have ever thought that such humble beginnings 10 years ago would have declined in the space of such a short time, to the present state of stupidity and equine excrement? Who would have thought that such a short interlude have prompted a regression in maturity that would have startled Darwin? Who you ask? Deep down in our beer bellies, we all know and what's more, we are pleased to have accomplished so little in such a short time, not withstanding the setback to the scientific and medical communities.
Due to the emotional significance of this year's trip, much planning was necessary. (Two hours instead of the usual one).
Amy Vanderbilt's *Book of Etiquette for Weddings and Mongols*, tells this humble scribe that the symbol for celebrating -a tenth is TIN. To that end, then, no expense was used in procuring all those things which surely we will treasure as memorabilia for many minutes to come.
Poor authority has it that the following notables have consented to be with us to help celebrate.
1) Joe and his dog Rin TIN TIN, (a.k.a. Marty)
2) Mike Diorio with his TIN cup
3) TINTIN (a foreign dignitary), (a.k.a. Harvey Connan)
4) The TIN Man (from the Wizard of Oz)
5) a representative from the War Amps, (a.k.a. Shaun O'Connor - TIN legs)
6) TINkerbell, (a.k.a. Ron Fitzmorris)
7) The Seal, who would like to be TIN (pronounced with French Canadian Accent)
8) The Stork (no explanation necessary)
9) Frank Rooney who made a fortune not investing in TIN.
10) TIN Tan (famous Oriental athlete with sunburnt eyelids)
11) Earl MacDonald (a little TIN on top)
12) TINderella (anybody's guess)
Aside from this international collection of pundits and pranksters, other features of this 10th annual will include:
1) The TINk-Big Contest (player to beat - R. Hoger)
2) The TIN Pan Alley Contest (drinking from a bed pan in the aisle of the bus)
3) The TINkling in the Rain Contest (against the wall in the showers)
4) Who's got the TINder? - Caesar's favourite question.
5) Variations on Rodin's famous statue "The TINker".
Surely, having read so far, you must be TINgling with excitement in anticipation of the forthcoming TINtabulation.
As the super special feature of this 10th annual, an invitation is being sent to everyone who has ever gone on the trip, all 47, yes that many.
So, if you are busTIN to go to BosTIN, you may receive further wonderful news by calling L.C.H.S. at 688-6330, or coming in person (disguised as yourself) to the L.T.H.T. conference headquarters (Kana Tavern, St. Laurent - Fridays after 6:00 p.m.)
This year's required qualifications include: American money, an ability to suffer verbal and physical abuse, and an original pun using the word "TIN".
The departure date is Friday, March 29th
Looking forward to ignoring you, I remain.
TINto (up yours Kemo Sabe)